If you bought £1000 of shares from Northern Rock in 2007, one year later it would have been worth £4.95. If, however, you bought £1000 of Tenants lager, drank it all, and then took the empty cans to the aluminium recycling plant, you would have got £214.
Moral: Drinking is financially more productive than banking. Tonight I am going for a pint.
Andrew Chapman / Author and Screenwriter 