It was a quiet Thursday afternoon. My television had mysteriously stopped working several weeks earlier. One day it was blazing its glorious bullshit into my mind the next minute the only thing on the screen was a rectangular box with the words “No Signal” in it. I am yet to establish a reason for my television’s sudden unwillingness to broadcast and am unlikely to find the energy to do so anytime soon.
Now I just sit there. Sometimes I read. Sometimes I just sit, staring at the blank screen, thinking about all the possibilities in the world, letting my mind slip into some kind of quiet hysteria. Somewhere in the silence, between my ears, was a deep truth. The whole universe was spread out before me. A meaning was within grasp. I pondered. I hypothesised and cogitated. I questioned and conjectured. I reached a deepness I didn’t know I had.
I went to Tesco. I found a product that would bring everything together in one great moment of enlightenment. I was giggling at the checkout.
This video is the sum total of all the wisdom I have gained from my weeks of thought and solitude. It shows me at my very deepest.
The video is called Cock Soup.