I Think Super Mario is a Leprechaun

I’ve just seen the trailer for the new Mario game that’s coming out on the Switch. I thought Mario was a human!? Mario Odyssey is based in the real world, instead of the Mushroom Kingdom, and so there are normal people milling around the city (New Donk City…) and Mario, by comparison, is clearly not human. I think Mario might be a leprechaun.


Everything I thought I new about Mario is a lie. Plumber my arse. That explains why he never a tool kit. He’s just a leprechaun with a fetish for boiler suits. Pervert.

Still, this is the first time I’ve been excited about a console coming out since 1996 when the N64 came out (mine’s been plugged in since 1997). The game looks damn good. I think I can get by Mario’s newly revealed perversion. That little deviant. The first thing I’m going to do when I get the game is jump on that woman’s head. I think she might be a Goomba in disguise.

Check out the trailer –