Audiobook Announcement!


I have some exciting news… The Accidental Scoundrel is being turned into an audiobook!

I will go into this in more detail in a later blog post, this is just a quicky to share my excitement. I love audiobooks. I have listened to hundreds of them over the years so the chance to hear my own book performed has me on the edge of elation.

As I said, I will go into this in more depth later in the week, but briefly, a sports commentator/producer/actor/broadcaster named Jake Sanson auditioned and was brilliant. The book went into production this week and the first 15 minutes is due in tomorrow for tweaks and notes.

That is all for now.

Can I say yippee and jump in the air like an excited child? I think I should allow myself the indulgence.


It’s FREE! The Accidental Scoundrel is FREE!!

The Accidental Scoundrel CoverThe Accidental Scoundrel is free right now. If you don’t already have it, get it. Kindle e-reader, kindle app on your phone, go to Amazon, download it for free. Read it. Laugh. Go back to Amazon and tell the fucking world how brilliant it is. Do it now. Go on. It’s free.

What else are you going to do? Eat crisps and watch Hollyoaks? Fuck that. Read the book. Jem Roberts likes it and he’s a comedy historian. This is what he said –

“Anyone disappointed that Hugh Laurie’s second novel never turned up will be glad they picked up The Accidental Scoundrel and gave it a damn good reading.” – Jem Roberts, author of the upcoming official Fry and Laurie biography, Soupy Twists!

The Accidental Scoundrel is free now and will be for the next few days. But don’t wait. If you all download it at the same time it will shoot up Amazon’s hourly charts and get it in front of more readers. I don’t even care if you read it. Just download it.

This is my new sales tactic. I’m just going to badger and harass people into getting it. Get the damn book! It’s free! What’s your fucking problem? I think this is going to work.

Get it here my wonderful friends –

The Periodical Son Returns

strand_blanched_soldierGood afternoon blog, and readers of blog. It’s been a while but here I am, back from the swamp of words that is novel writing. And I have some exciting news! So brace yourself. Sit back in your chair and hold on to your laptop for safety, this is bracing stuff. In a way.

I was thinking to myself, who are the greatest writers of old and how did they become popular? Charles Dickens and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle came to mind immediately. Both of these chaps first released their books in serial form. A chapter a week in a magazine or newspaper. So I have decided to do the same. The Accidental Scoundrel is being released one chapter at a time on The first two chapters are there now and I will add a new one on a regular basis periodically. I’m not sure it will be weekly though. In the fast world we live in, and with all that is out there to grab our attentions, I will most probably add a new chapter every three days.

After the series is finished I will release The Accidental Scoundrel as a paperback and ebook on Amazon.

Pop over to Jottify via this direct link – and have a look. I would love to know if anyone has tried this route themselves or if you think this is a good idea, or even a terrible one, let me know what you think.

Currently I am listed as the most read author of the day (yeah baby!). Help me stay at the top by reading and enjoying each installment as they come!

For now though that is all, I will try and come here more often and write interesting posts about wonderful things, but until then, have a good Easter!

Orgasmic Proof Reading


I seem to have forgotten how to blog. It all started so well. Each week, a new post. Do you remember my first post? It was called The Manuscript Thief and was about me drunkenly letting one of my parent’s friends, Steve, take the unedited first draft of a manuscript home with him to read. This is a mistake that all new authors must avoid.

To cut a long story short he said he would go through it with a red pen and highlight any spelling or grammatical mistakes. Now, I learned how important it is to get yourself proof read when I prematurely released Tripping the Night Fantastic without seeking a proof reader. This mistake was reflected in the first few reviews. I then had to take the book off sale, make the necessary changes, and re-release it. So overall I was glad that Steve had offered to go through The Accidental Scoundrel (formally known as A Scoundrel for Love) manuscript with a red pen.

The problem is, he vanished. Months went by with little contact. It turns out he got a job in Scotland and moved without so much as a goodbye, or a, “Here’s your book back, sorry, I haven’t had time to look at it”. No, I wasted months waiting for him to hand it back so I could make the corrections and send it out into the world. Because of this the release date of the book has been delayed by 5 months.

Luckily the time away from the novel has allowed me to look at it with fresh eyes. The errors have revealed themselves to me and I have got the book to a point I am happy with. More importantly I have found myself a new proof reader!

She is the land lady of my local pub, Kerry. And here are four good reasons for why she makes an excellent proof reader –

  1. She keeps me at a satisfactory level of drunkenness and hasn’t banned me from the pub regardless of my frustrating and intolerable behaviour when drunk.
  2. She invited me up to her flat recently and I was surprised to discover a vast collection of books not dissimilar to my own. She reads. A lot.
  3. She’s a bit of a grammar Nazi (one of the less frowned upon branches of Nazism) and has proof read a manuscript before for a writerly relative.
  4. She has a very nice bottom. Now, this point may not have much to do with her abilities as a proof reader but it is very important.

It will be a few weeks before I get it back but I do trust her to actually give it back. (Unlike Steve! Pah to you Steve!). When she does hand it back, and says something like, “Oh Andy! It was marvellous! Funny and witty and charming, oh Andy, it was just fantastic. And there were hardly any mistakes! I do love a man with a good grasp of grammar!” And then she’ll probably swoon. Or have an unprompted orgasm, or something. What was I saying? Oh yes, when I do get it back I will announce the release date and send out review copies to anyone who wants one.